My favorite Sarah Silverman jokes:
"I drank and smoked during pregnancy and then I read the pamphlet and called my mom and said, 'Don't bother to knit the sleeves.' "
"I never got attention from guys, and then the old story, I got the braces off ... my legs."
"My friend said, 'You have to read this book; it's a page turner. I said, '”Well, I know how books work."
“My friend was told by her doctor that she was morbidly obese ... as if she doesn't have enough on her plate.”
"Women reach their sexual peak after 35 years ... men after four minutes."
"I've always wanted to own a maternity shop. I'd call it:” We're Fucked!"
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